7 Life Coaches Share Their Secret Tricks to Happiness

BY Lindsay Tigar · June 30, 2016

We all have different mood-enhancing tricks to get our minds back on track whenever we’re feeling kind of meh. But if your normal endorphin-boosting go-tos aren’t doing the trick, you might need to try something that’s a little more insightful. And who’s coming to the rescue? These inspirational life coaches who help people see the positive side of their lives for a living. While there’s no shortcut to being completely happy, perhaps one of these mind hacks will help you see things a little differently.


Do something that scares you.

“My most unique, interesting, simple trick for finding happiness is to do something that scares you. Go sky-diving, travel alone, drive to somewhere you’ve never been, start a conversation with a stranger, fly in an airplane, share what you’re really feeling, sing karaoke. Whatever it is that scares you, just do it! Don’t think about it, don’t analyze it and definitely don’t talk yourself out of it. Just go for it. You’ll be surprised where you find happiness when you get way, way, way out of your comfort zone.”

Carmen Parks

Get comfortable spending time alone every single day.

“The simplest and most profound ‘trick’ to finding happiness is spending time by yourself daily. Watching TV, reading or any other mindless activity does not count. This is spending quality time with yourself. Recognizing your energy levels, where your attention goes for the day, what your body requires as far as exercise, sleep and, of course, food. This special time with self often leads to the emotion of joy. And when we are in the energy of joy, nothing is wrong, fearful, angst-ridden, etc. All is perfect at that exact moment. That joy can settle in and expand outwardly to more parts of the body. We stay longer in the moment of being versus doing.”

Christine Alexandria

Stop labeling your feelings.

“When people have become obsessed with finding happiness but continue to feel like they are coming up short, I suggest for them to forget about happiness. Take it completely off the table. I tell them to not give an emotional label to their experiences, but rather live them. Yes, I remind them to live. Be in the moment; be present. We get so worked up about ‘finding happiness’ that we forget that it is all around us and in this very moment.”

Kristy De Leon, LMFT 

Accept and appreciate every emotion

“The best trick to finding happiness is to truly be OK with all the other emotions that are living inside of you! Let’s be honest: Happiness is a great moment in time where you are experiencing something so amazing that nothing else matters. To achieve this, you must weed out and heal the emotions in you that are blocking you from feeling joy. Each emotion within has a voice: Ask your hurt, sadness, fear to have a talk with you. Write out your emotions. Then you will be able to hear the cravings inside of you and what you truly desire.”

Joan Marie 

Shift your focus to purpose.

“Focus more on purpose and passion. If you have purpose in your life, you will be happier more often than not. Purpose helps you get up before your alarm goes off. Purpose makes you feel useful and meaningful. If your purpose is something you are passionate about, that is like winning the lottery. Happiness is the amazing side effect.”

Sarah Stewart, MSW, CPC

Do more things you like.

You can find happiness and create a life you love in two steps: 1.) Do more of what you like, and 2.) Do less of what you don’t like. This may sound stupidly simple, but it’s not always easy. If you look at all the things you do every day, how many fall in category 1 (things you like) and how many in category 2 (things you don’t like)? Many people spend a lot of their time in category 2 and wonder why their life is unsatisfying. We often do things we don’t like because we think we have to or are too afraid to change course. Shedding the tasks and activities you don’t like creates space for more of what you do like. If you want to love your life, start living a life you love.”

Pam Bauer

Be yourself, all of the time, no exceptions.

“Be who you really are, not who others expect you to be. Relax and enjoy life the way you want to; the world doesn’t fall apart when you do this. This requires caring a little less about what others think and caring a lot about your own core values. As we get older, we realize that our time and energy are such precious, valuable resources, and we have to choose how to use them wisely. That means we need to care less about what doesn’t really matter and care a lot about what matters most.”

Jennifer Coleman

Lindsay Tigar

Lindsay Tigar is a writer and editor in New York. She writes lifestyle content for Bustle, YourTango, AskMen, Woman's Day, Women's Health and many more. She’s an aspiring boxer, wannabe yogi and lover of cardio dance ... Read More >